Monday, June 21, 2010

First Steps? Difficult, Indeed.

You know how something stands before you in your life, an obstacle that keeps you from moving from Point A to that always attractive but often elusive Point B?

Maybe its an argument unresolved between you and a good friend, maybe its that room that you have let so much shit pile up in that it seems there is barely room to breathe, maybe its living your life recklessly, with little regard for your body and then realizing that you have a long way to go to repair the damage you have done to it.

No matter what the obstacle is, the very first step you take towards it is the most difficult one. Well, maybe not THE most difficult, but certainly one of the most difficult. I often wonder if the last ones are the toughest, because that is often when you are at your weakest.

For weeks I have left this blog, um, well, how do I say it?

Un-blogged upon.

For weeks I have wondered how I can get back to it. For weeks I have let many people who care about me in the world exist in the dark, many fearing for me so much that they reached out personally.

To those folks I say thanks. While I would not say I was at Rock Bottom, I certainly was very close to it and just so you know it's really fucking dark down there. Stay up near the surface where the light shines through and the water stays warm.

But what would I say if I started blogging again? How could I just pick it back up again after so many weeks? How do I explain that long absence?

The answer? I'm not worrying about it.

I'm back, and I'll get to the particulars later. The key was taking the first step, which I have just done. And that's all I need worry about this afternoon.

Anyway...I'm back. I'm OK. I have much to write about.

And that's that.


  1. I'm a long time reader but recently new poster to your blog. (I feel like a radio caller now, LOL)

    I am sorry that you were down low in the dimness lately. I think we all go through that, the key is being able to see that we are there, and fighting to make our way back to the surface.

    I hope you are there soon.

  2. So glad you have resurfaced.No explanation needed and those of us,who have dwelled in that dark place,get it.Lived there many times myself and sometimes,knowing others have inhabited a similar place, brings comfort and knowledge that you to too will pass up and through it.

    Welcome back.

  3. :)

    glad your back...pick up with no explanation!

  4. Excellent! "A journey of a thousand miles...."

  5. Just glad to hear from you. You've been in my prayers.

  6. I'm glad you did. It's tough picking back up after so long.

  7. By the way, another cross and x moment, the picture you used to open this blog...I used it in one of my Sunday school lessons to the college kids. Yeah, I know it comes up when you google obstacles etc... but, well, FYI.

  8. Welcome back! Good to hear from you.

  9. No explanation needed here unless you just want to....Been missing your posts and so glad to see you keeping your fingers busy again....



  10. This is Joyce. There is probably no one who understands better than your blog followers. No explanation needed. So glad to read your thoughts again.

  11. So glad that you are back. I've been worried about you. So much that I even started stalking your FB page. I have missed you.

  12. Welcome back Ken. I hope you had a great Father's Day.

  13. I'm glad to see you back. Breaks are sometimes needed. No problems.

  14. EXPLAIN YOURSELF, MAN! Where were you, what were you doing, with whom, why, was she hot, and we want details! Pictures! Full disclosure!

    Or not.

  15. Hi Ken,

    Glad u r back.I don't know if I am counted as one of the followers of your blog,but I am a regular follower,so there u go (you can make it 82 again).

    I think I should have posted this comment on your next post,but I am sure you don't mind.


  16. I said it before -- I'm glad you're back. I'm sorry to hear that you were down in the depths -- and glad that you emerged. There's not much to say that isn't some silly platitude, so I'll leave it at it's good to hear from you.

  17. Gotta agree with everyone else. Really glad you're back to it and really there's no explanation needed. Sometimes we just need to step away to make sure our head is screwed on right. Good to have you back, Ken.


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