The truth is, he is not a monster about cookies at all.
And it isn't even a cookie, it's a high-fiber granola bar. The boy is more tightly bound up than the inside of a baseball. Even a miniscule dose of Risperdal causes that I guess.
But what Bennett has been, over the last few weeks, is a delight to watch evolve and grow.
And evolve he has.
His self-injurious behavior and even most of his aggression is SO manageable right now. Not sure why. Not sure how. Not sure I give a crap.
I only know that he is the happiest and most contented he has been in two years. Why should ANYTHING else matter as to the why? Although you know I do dwell on it. I seek answers. It's what I do, even when I say I don't.
As he is rounding the corner on his two-year anniversary of the removal of his Brain Tumor, he has come a LONG way. I still haven't been able to get him to say 'Hi Daddy!', something he could do at 18 months with relative ease, even after all this time, but he can do so many OTHER things and guess what?
I've stopped pushing Bennett, and most importantly, myself. It will come when HE is ready. And I've accepted it. Finally.
I am now moving at Bennett-speed in all Bennett-related matters, and I am not bothered by this anymore. Something has taken hold inside me, something I cannot explain...yet. And as you can see, the extra Speech Therapy was REALLY paying off. Too bad the Ohio State Government took a giant DOODY all over THAT part of his treatment. We'll just have to find another way to keep that aspect of his brain stimulated.
And now, as he is nearing 4 years of age, he is finally taking a mild interest in a couple of books and the social interchange of sitting beside me and having me flip through some pages.
THIS IS MONUMENTAL.
This from a boy who has resisted ALL attempts at this act that all parents of typical children, MYSELF INCLUDED, often take for granted. I don't take it for granted anymore. Bennett walks up to me with a book and says 'Buh--?' in Benglish? I stop what I am doing and READ THE FRIGGIN' BOOK.
Except once when I was SO close to finishing Case 6 in Dead Rising 2 (yeah, yeah, an old game, but I haven't had the scratch for L.A. Noire or any other new games so I am playing old ones or ones I happen to get for free from an old friend at Capcom, thanks dude!). On this game I couldn't stop in the middle since there was no actual save point in a boss fight, so I did have to ask him to wait a few. But give a guy a break, after a long stressful day some of you drink, some of you go bowling, some of you watch American Idol...I kill zombies and think about Eddie.
Similar philosophy adopted with Carter on the book front, I need to spend more time with him on that, as he is still enjoying, at the newly acquired age of 7, some of the conceptual Art of Star Wars stuff I have been showing him at bed time.
Carter's birthday was last week, one themed after Pirates of the Caribbean. A POTC party helps when your Old Man has some creepy toys to throw into the mix as party decor. He loved 'em. I have more pics, and some I need to snag from family, and I will show them next week.
I have no regrets at all about not showing them last week in 'real time' and using this blog as a springboard to other things.
One day, I hope both of those boys can look back at that week and be proud of their Dad, even though for a while I was fairly unavailable to them and their Mom, and will continue to be pressed for time a wee bit longer.
During one of the more stressful days last week, Carter comes in (he is still home all day from school for summer break) and says something that only a kid can say. Poor kid is SO bored out of his mind. I had such a different plan for his summer vacation, but the economy is such crap I have had to work a lot more than I ever imagined to scrape by without a full-time, steady gig and all the plans that were laid have only been marginally realized.
But leave it to him to always give me a laugh just at the time when I need it the most, when I am right on the ragged edge of the abyss ready to jump off, screaming all the way down.
'Daddy, it costs three million dollars to get into Heaven. For other people it's Free.'
I think I'll start saving now.